so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
