Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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