theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Randomize
