We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
