These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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