on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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