lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
