remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize