Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
