Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
