We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Randomize
