so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
