i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Randomize
