As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
