i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
