i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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