Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
