I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
