There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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