ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
