where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
