xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Randomize
