Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Randomize
