remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
