Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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