Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
