i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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