They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
