Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
