Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
