You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
