all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
