trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
