so explain again why im purple
no
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
