Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
The air taste purple.
Randomize
