don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
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