He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
