sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
