tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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