Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Randomize
