You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
It's shark week go big or go home
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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