I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
