How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize