I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
