i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
