Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
