bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
