i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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