I hate all girls vehemently.
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
