she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
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